Quotes For Anyone Who's Perfected The Art Of Avoiding Other People

I can admit it, I don't love interacting with people. In fact, I typically go out of my way to avoid having to stop and try to small-talk my way through an uncomfortable run-in with someone I know while I'm out in public.

Which is why I rarely left my house, even before...well, you know. Before all this happened.

So when I say that I've perfected the art of avoiding other people, I mean I've really perfected it. If you're the same way, I think you're really going to enjoy these quotes.

It's a "no" for me.

This is why any invitation to a hangout that's passed my way is always followed-up with one simple question: "how many people are going to be there?"

If it's more than like, four, I'll almost definitely "remember" that I actually have something to do that night. But maybe next time! (Yeah, right.)

We are not the same person.

I don't know how that girl is, but I really don't appreciate her RSVP-ing to things for me when I most definitely have zero interest in going to them. If she was so excited about karaoke night with people, why am I the one stuck going now?

It's just not fair.

Clearly I need to reevaluate my tactics.

When I was working part-time at a grocery store in high school, I was so determined not to talk to anyone in the lunch room that I guess I would put on a bit of an RBF (resting bitch face) while I ate.

Which is how I earned the ironic name "smiley" from one amused deli worker.

Really, I'm doing this for both of us.

I like to operate under the assumption that other people also don't feel like being forced into awkward social interactions, simply because we happen to know each other, even if just vaguely, outside of this grocery store.

I will happily take the lead and duck away into a different aisle so we can both go on with our quiet shopping trips and pretend we didn't make full eye contact back there.

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