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Quotes That Prove Marriage Is Basically Just Grown-Up Babysitting

Updated September 8, 2021

I refuse to sugarcoat it: marriage might as well be called grown-up babysitting because that's pretty much what we do.

I'm not trying to hate on husbands here but can we all agree that it's a wonder they ever survived so long without us? Considering that so many of them can't do simple, every day tasks by themselves, and don't know where anything is in the house, I feel like they literally need us to survive at this point.

If you feel the same way, then I think you're really going to enjoy these quotes.

Yup, that's it.

It's also watching your husband walk into your freshly-cleaned kitchen and feeling your entire body fill with pure dread as you look at the clock and realize that it's lunchtime, and that man's about to try to be Gordon Ramsay in your sparkling space.

That hat just became part of your kitchen island.

Doesn't matter how many times you beg for him to just put his stupid hat somewhere else, anywhere else, he's going to keep it right where he dropped it that day as if it's now crucial to the structural integrity of your island.

How dare we put things where they're supposed to be?!

The best mornings are the ones that start with him stomping around the house looking for his belt, complaining that "nothing's ever in the right spot" and accusing you of hiding it on him...all the while it's literally in his drawer where it belongs.

They never stay closed. Never.

Why is it that men simply cannot and will not close a single cabinet door or kitchen drawer after they've opened one? What is stopping them from taking an extra 0.5 seconds to close it?

If anyone has an answer, please let me know because this is the biggest, most unanswered question of my adulthood that has only continued to haunt me.