TikTok isn't just a platform for insipid attention seekers vying for any sliver of public attention to fill the ever-widening void in their own soul...well, it is, but sometimes those very people do have some interesting stories to share!
So, please enjoy this carefully tailored selection of the best recent TikTok story-times.
This one is pretty strange, I'll warn you now.
This story started with TikTok user "icantfindcarl" explaining that they are a private person and that none of their friends have ever seen them naked.
(Incidentally, none of my friends have seen me naked, and I had no idea that this was a signifier that I'm a private person, but whatever.)
This person explained that their friend started the rumor that they have no nipples...yeah, weird right?
Apparently, this spread like wildfire around the school with this unfortunate person only being able to deny the claims.
Yep, in the car park one of their friends was stood with a sign reading, "You don't have nipples... but you could have a prom date."
I mean, it's pretty damn embarrassing, but it looks like they're going to prom which is something to look forward to, I guess?
This one is a real rollercoaster, so strap in.
The story started with TikTok user Lizzie Davis explaining that when she was young she was playing Marco Polo with an older boy in a swimming pool.
Not realizing that she was swimming beneath him, the boy kicked her in the face, accidentally knocking her into the drain at the bottom of the pool.
Terrifyingly, Lizzie's braces got stuck in the drain... a terrifying idea I know.
Just thinking about how an 8th grader could do that in the spirit of self-preservation is pretty intense.
Congrats to Lizzie, I guess, for surviving this truly horrific ordeal. I'll never look at a swimming pool drain the same again.
This one is a little graphic, I should warn you.
It started with Tucker explaining that him and his friends were taking two different cars on the way to get some food, when an idea overcame him.
However, Tucker was quickly punished for this action, as his friend threw a penny at him which hit him in one of his "plums."
The pain didn't go down over time though, and in the end Tucker had to go to hospital.
I suppose that the moral of the story here is...well, you don't really need me to say it, do you? Don't be a complete dolt and wave your privates out of the window. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes!
Grace took to TikTok to tell the story of how she went to the toilet while working one day, only for a customer to collapse on the floor in the bathroom and start having a seizure.
Alarmed, she called for her manager.
By the time the manager arrived, the woman had managed to get to her feet and ran out of the restaurant.
Grace and her manager followed, and saw the woman get into a car and begin driving around erratically.
The woman careered her car into a series of banks and ultimately into a gas station, where the police went after her.
Later that evening, the police found a syringe cap in Grace's work's bathroom stalls. Grace had to give a statement to the police, and is now terrified of using the toilets at work ever since the ordeal.
TikTok user Zoe Roe started her story by explaining that a man came into the jewelry store that they work in to buy a present for his wife for their 10-year anniversary.
However, after making the purchase, the man then wanted to make another purchase...in a somewhat shady manner.
Zoe said, "Sure," then asked him what he was looking for, to which he replied he wanted something saying, "Girlfriend" and also said, "happy one-year anniversary."
Zoe did as instructed, and then he had her mark a "K" for "Kristen" on his wife's jewelry bag, and an "L" for "Laura" on the bottom of the bag for his girlfriend.
She then ended her story by saying that she had "accidentally" put the wrong names on each of the bags!
I'm sure that Laura and Kristen will love their presents this year!
