Cards can be a great way to celebrate occasions, offer condolences, and just generally show others that you care about them. However, some people like to use them for more nefarious and hilarious means.
And, with this idea in mind, please enjoy these 17+ funny cards that came with unexpected laughs!
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“My friend had surgery on her deviated septum today (she accidentally called it a deviated scrotum), so a friend and I got her a card.”
Yeah, the phrase “deviated scrotum” was definitely not one that I ever wanted to hear in my life. And now I can’t stop thinking about it!
“I was admitted to the hospital before Christmas for emergency surgery due to a ruptured ovarian cyst. This is how my sister tagged my gift…”
Siblings really do have a unique way of making us feel better in ways that no one else can, don’t they?
“One of my girlfriend’s students gave her this card for her birthday.”
Wow, that kid got started with the nihilism really early! I always find that it’s good to get them interested in the bleak, hopeless misery of reality when they’re nice and young!
“I received a birthday card. Thanks ‘grampa.'”
I always hate it when someone writes something absolutely heartfelt and beautiful in a card and then you have to follow it. I think I’ll adopt this technique next time.
“This [guy’s] business card…”
I wonder what their returns policy is like? I mean, if I don’t like the job they do, will they come back and put it painstakingly back the way that it was? I should hope so!
“My dad accidentally bought a same sex Valentine’s Day card and instead of getting another card, he drew a little beard on one of the women.”
Modern problems require modern solutions! Also, cards aren’t cheap, there’s no way I’d just buy another one! I’m not Alan Sugar…which is good as I don’t want to be a talking walnut really.
“Great Birthday Card! This 11-year-old gets life.”
If I were the recipient, I would be very unsettled by how close they had put me to the end. It’s like this kid knows something that no one else does.
“My wife works at the VA where school kids dropped off cards. The elderly vet that got this one responded: ‘I’m not dead yet!'”
Ah yes, this guy must have been a veteran of the U.S.’s space war against the Martian people of Pluto. Yeah, you’d think that they’d be from Mars, wouldn’t you? Just shows what you know about the Space War!
“Not really into Valentine’s Day, but my boyfriend played it well this year…”
I also struggle to buy cards with hearts on them, as it always feels so false. But, I normally just give in, swallow my pride, and buy one anyway. Life has truly ground me down.
“Made a card for my friend’s graduation from art school.”
The split words is a lovely addition, but the fact that they wrote it out in Comic Sans is a stroke of genius, and will likely give the recipient a stroke!
“Wife modified a 5yo birthday card for my brother’s 35th.”
If I described a person as being like the age 35, then I would expect that person to punch me in the face!
“Best card I got today!”
Now, call me mad, but something tells me that this baby didn’t actually put this card together. I think that this baby had its assistant do it, which is just disingenuous, quite frankly.
The Thought Was There… Sort Of!
The person who posted this wrote, “Our dog died. [Neighbor’s] kid made us a card. She was embarrassed by it. So she scratched her name out and wrote her [mom’s] name instead. Was so funny that it actually cheered me up. His name was Ollie.”
“Since my niece could write her name, we have been mailing each other. Haven’t sent or received in a while, but just got this today and this kid cracks me up!”
I don’t know what would worry me more: the fact that this niece is actually 45 or that her boogers are acid green…
“My mom found out my dad has been cheating and since they don’t exactly make cards for this occasion I had to improvise.”
Hopefully this cheered their mother up during this horrible time! I also think that someone should start making cards for such occasions!
“Saw this card in a shop today…”
Now, I love Bob Ross and I absolutely love this card, but there is something about his dead-eyed stare on this card that is quite unsettling!
“I’m in the hospital for the week as I’ve just been diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. This was on the card that came with the flowers my sisters sent me.”
I can only imagine how pleased these two siblings were when they thought of this pun. I would have never gotten over it. I lead a sad life, it’s true.
“The Valentine’s Day card I bought for my husband.”
Pfft, who would ever be so drunk on a first date that they can’t remember it? Definitely not me!
*Struggles to recall a single first date ever…
“In the hospital with pancreatitis, this is the get well soon card [that] my daughter drew for me.”
This is painfully adorable, with emphasis on the painful. That’s also one of the most angry pancreases that I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen some angry pancreases in my time!
“Made my gf a Valentine’s Day card.”
This guy hit the brief perfectly. This must have been the easiest job of Card Man’s life.
