Quotes For When You're Only Interested In Cleaning Out The Wine Rack

I'll be honest, it's been a while since I actually cleaned my house. But I can tell you exactly when the last time I drank an entire bottle of wine was (last night, just FYI).

Eventually I'll get that urge to finally pick up the broom and get to work but until then, I'm perfectly content just pouring myself another tall glass of the good stuff and ignoring all the clutter.

If you're also avoiding all your responsibilities in favor of enjoying a nice drink (or four), I think you're really going to enjoy these quotes.

"And I clearly lost."

Don't be alarmed by the mess. Nothing bad has happened here, unless you count me losing my TV remote somewhere in all this crap as "bad."

Which, by the way, I do.

That's it, that's how you describe my place.

As you can see, the stampede of wild animals has already come through here. And if you look in the kitchen, you'll see some monkeys tearing the place apart.

You're just the worst.

You turn the simple act of sweeping into an irritating, curse-inducing chore that usually ends with me kicking you under the fridge and walking away in a huff.

I thought that was obvious?


And when I said I was "hoovering," I meant I was shoveling Hot Cheetos into my mouth without taking a breath between handfuls.

Sorry for any confusion.

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