Living your life can be a test sometimes. In modern life, there is a lot to keep on top of ⏤ from remembering to keep yourself well-fed and hydrated, to remembering all of your myriad of passwords for your various streaming accounts.
At times when the challenges of the world get a little too overwhelming, it can be natural to want to go back to being a child, when you were stress-free and happy! So, with that in mind, here are 12+ tweets for people who could really use a babysitter!
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Tech Guru
I hate it when you change your password that you’ve forgotten, only to type in a new one and get a notification saying, “New password cannot be the same as old password”.
Classism 101
People need to stop hating on Lunchables, they’re bloody top-notch! I mean, I’d rather have a Dairylea Dunker, but Lunchables are still good.
*Sigh*
We are truly living in dark days where the president of the United States of America is in need of a babysitter aren’t we?
The Perfect Business Model
I can’t think of a more future-proof business model. I mean, no matter what happens, people will always need to humiliate their exes!
Professionalism At Its Finest
Cats can be very useful for keeping pests at bay, provided your cat isn’t lazy as hell like mine I guess. However, one other cat owner shared a quite hilarious and unsettling story in the comments, writing :
“My cats love catching mice. But they are too well-fed to go for the kill. So they just end up walking around with a tiny screaming animal in their mouth. It really makes it difficult to get to sleep if I am being honest.”
They Also Light Up
It’s like no one cares how fast I can run in my new shoes anymore. Also, people don’t care that I saw a really big spider the other day either!
How Do You Send Your Spare Time?
Look, I’m not saying that this isn’t amazing and all; but, why don’t you try and read a book or something instead? Maybe learn a new skill?
At Least She Is Paying For It?
Look, no matter what fruits and things that the put on the bottle, it always just tastes of detergent. No matter how many hundreds you drink, they’re all terrible. Trust me.
Learning About Wind!
Not being able to sleep leads to you ending up on some very strange Wikipedia deep-dives!
The Morning Mantra
The beauty of tomorrow being that tomorrow never comes, with its damn salads and protein shakes!
Sea Level
Someone rightly pointed out that the real quote from the film is, “I’m the king of the world!” So, who is the stupid idiot now, eh?
Feeding Stray Animals
More love has gone into this meal for a stray racoon than goes into the meals that I make for myself, which is a truly depressing fact.
Weird Goth Letters
Q is the kind of letter that should be smoking around the back of the library!
“Make Coke Fun Again!”
Coca-Cola is fine the way it is! Also, no one wants the doubtless massive price hike that adding cocaine back into Coca-Cola would cause.
Stop Flirting With Me!
Yeah, you can do miles better than a little freeloader that doesn’t have a job, you tell em girl!
Babysitting The Babysitter
This seems like a plot thread in a stoner comedy featuring Seth Rogan and all of his usual array of co-stars.
It Ain’t Easy Being Cheesy
There is one guy sat in the marketing department of Glanbia Cheese sweating furiously at this tweet.
*Head Falls Into Hands*
Dads who make jokes of such poor quality should be supervised at all times!
Keep The Demons At Bay
It’s important to always flash your torch under your bed to check for real estate agents and lawyers!
Economics 101
Ha! I gave up with the whole saving money lark many years ago. Sometimes I like to think of it as saving in terms of saving material wealth.
