Following the release of her latest album, which features a song called "More", about how she wants to have a child, Halsey opened up about how she was hesitant to release the song because of a few since-deleted tweets she made a year ago about miscarrying.
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Halsey Opens Up About Her Miscarriage: 'It's The Most Inadequate I've Ever Felt'
Halsey knows what it means to be successful.
She's in her early 20s and already has three successful albums under her belt, and shows no signs of stopping any time soon.
But that doesn't mean she doesn't know heartbreak.
Instagram | @iamhalsey
Between her personal struggles and breakup after breakup, it can take a toll on anyone.
The star even performed when she was going through one of her biggest heartbreaks ever.
She had a miscarriage on stage.
It was one of the moments that would define her life, and that she, and her fans, would remember forever.
It was that event, amongst two more that would follow, that would inspire one of her future songs.
To kick off 2020, Halsey released her third album, "Manic," and fans have been absolutely loving it!
Little did anybody know, she "was petrified to release it,” she told The Guardian.
If you've had a chance to listen through her new album, you may have strumbled upon the track "More."
Her emotional lyrics describe her wanting to have a child, but facing some difficulties in doing so.
"A couple years of waiting rooms, finding god and lose him too, wanna scream but what's the use?" the song begins.
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"They told me it's useless There's no hope in store But somehow I just want you more"
"Wooden floors and little feet, a flower bud in concrete, feeling so incomplete, wonder will we ever meet?"
Instagram | @iamhalsey
"And would you know it right away, how hard I tried to see your face?" the song continues.
"I sit and I stare at your clothes in the drawer, I cry and my knuckles get sore, 'cause I still believe it won't be like before, now somehow I just want you more."
Instagram | @iamhalsey
While promoting her album, Halsey recently opened up, revealing that she was actually quite apprehensive about releasing that song because of how profoundly true it is.
Another song on her album also touches on having a baby, but in a very different light.
In her song "You Should Be Sad" — a country-esque song throwing tons of shade at her ex-boyfriend (presumably G-Eazy), she suggests that she almost had a baby with him.
"I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you, 'cause you can't love nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for you," she sings.
Instagram | @iamhalsey
While she may have been glad not to have a baby with whoever this song is about, she does still want to have a baby with the right person.
According to Elle UK, Halsey tweeted and deleted this message last year:
Instagram | @iamhalsey
"I have endometriosis. I’ve had 3 miscarriages, 4 surgeries, pretty much in pain every day of my life."
"And I’ve donated/raised upwards of $300,000 in the name of research and support," she continued.
"I’m not trying to be quirky. Or different. I’m just trying to normalize an under-discussed illness."
While she may have taken the tweet down around the time that she wrote it, she seems to be in a place where she is ready to talk about it again.
Understandably, it can't be an easy thing to share, having as many eyes on her as she does.
"It’s the most inadequate I’ve ever felt," she said in an interview with The Guardian last week.
She explained that she feels frustrated that even though she's found success in music, she hasn't been able to do the thing that she thinks, biologically speaking, she should be able to do.
"Here I am achieving this out-of-control life," she said. "And I can’t do the one thing I’m biologically put on this earth to do."
She went on, explaining that to add insult to injury, she and her brand portray femininity, which she feels is ironic in the worst way.
"Then I have to go onstage and be this sex symbol of femininity and empowerment?" she said.
"It is demoralizing."
The good news is, despite her illness, things are looking good for Halsey's chances of becoming a mother.
So, good for her for speaking up about a topic that is often considered taboo, but is far more common than you may think.
Let us know what you think of Halsey's latest album, "Manic" and her most recent interview with The Guardian.
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