Jay-Z has a very particular set of skills. Skills he has acquired over a very long career, skills that make him a nightmare for people who take videos of Beyoncé without asking.
So, in case you missed it:
Diddy turned 50, and let’s just say that he did it in absolute style.
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He threw the party at his own home, and packed it to the rafters with every single one of his celebrity friends.
His party was so lit that Vanity freakin’ Fair was there.
Diddy had the entire party documented by photographer Kaito for Vanity Fair , then spread all across Instagram by its prestigious attendees.
This is such a legit way to turn 50. Happy birthday, Diddy.
The guest list was insane.
Like, everyone who’s anyone was at that party.
Kim. Kanye. Lizzo. Kelly Rowland, Mary J Blige, Cardi B, Regina King, Snoop, Kylie, Khloé, Chadwick Boseman, Janelle Monáe…oh, and Beyoncé and Jay-Z, of course.
Oh, and speaking of Jay-Z?
He and Kanye being in the same place is kind of a big deal.
They had a pretty public falling out about three years ago, and the blood has been bad between them for a while.
Queen Bey even broke her Instagram rule for Diddy.
As many in the Beyhive know, Beyoncé almost never captions her Instagram posts.
However, for the two posts she dedicated to Diddy’s party, she wrote, “Happy Birthday Diddy!”
Hey, it’s not much. But for Beyoncé? That’s news.
Now, on to the important stuff.
Clock the distinctive features on Beyoncé’s dress, because those are about to become very important.
The actual video of the incident doesn’t show her face at all, so the way to recognize her? Jay’s presence, and her dress.
Here’s what happened:
Beyoncé was dancing with Michelle Rowland and rapper Saweetie.
A couple of dudes were dancing next to them, and one of them had a phone. Even though it looks like he was mostly recording himself, Jay wasn’t having it.
He snatched that phone REAL quick.
Yikes . Jay grabbed his phone so quickly you can barely see it on your first watch.
The person recording also quickly panned away, which makes me wonder why Jay didn’t notice them, too.
Y’all…I’m dying at that man’s reaction.
He immediately put his hands up like he knew he’d just done something wrong.
Everyone on this planet knows better than to cross Jay-Z when it comes to Beyoncé. Actually, scratch that. Everyone on this planet knows better than to cross Jay-Z, period.
I feel like everyone is sleeping on this moment.
Kelly Rowland’s diplomacy knows no bounds.
While Jay-Z went to take care of business, Kelly gathered up Saweetie and Beyoncé and turned all of their backs to the drama. Now that’s a queen.
I need to know what this man saw.
On top of Kelly sweeping everyone away from the drama, she also turned them towards an official photographer in the crowd.
Who was this man, and what crucial footage does he have?
Let’s watch that in gif form.
Thank you, Twitter user @QueenDanaerysT, who did us all a public service and turned this moment into an endlessly rewatchable gif.
The grab. The hands. The facial expression of a disappointed dad.
The memes started rolling in.
I don’t know why, but that gif is the perfect representation of Jay-Z’s actual face.
I gotta know if that guy ever got his phone back. I want to believe he did, but…you never know.
EXACTLY.
That person had to have their phone up pretty high to be getting footage from that angle, and yet Jay-Z skipped that and went right for Mr. Sneaky Selfie.
Maybe everything turned out alright.
A few people noticed that you can see Beyoncé reaching for the offender, maybe to have her own word with him. Or she was getting him his phone back.
Either way, we’ve all learned a lesson here: Don’t sneakily record Beyoncé if you don’t want your phone snatched.
