Did Teen Sister Go Too Far When Calling Out Brother-in-Law's Parenting?

Baby sitting
Shutterstock | 137002

When it comes to parenting, it's essential for parents to take the lead. However, the teenage sister of a 34-year-old woman was put in a difficult situation when her sister called her up in an emergency and asked her to watch her kids but her husband refused. After the teenage girl made the snack for the kids, the husband refused to help and that's when things got heated. Is the teenage girl in the wrong for speaking out or is the husband the one to blame?

My sister's work had an emergency, but her husband refused to "babysit" his kids. What do you think of this parenting?

throwaway9876-57 | throwaway9876-57

Sister left, leaving kids with brother-in-law. He was changing baby's diaper, kids asked for snack. He told them to go to dad 😳

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Kids caught in the middle of a parenting conflict between Dad and brother-in-law

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Teen sister calls out brother-in-law's parenting, saying he doesn't understand how hard it is and considers it "babysitting"

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Sister confronts brother-in-law over parenting, but ends up being kicked out 🤔

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Teen sister's dramatic call-out of brother-in-law's parenting has sparked family tension

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Tension between teen sister and brother-in-law escalates over parenting disagreement

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Edit: Whoa! Unanticipated response. Thanks for the comments, but why the messages with inappropriate content? 😮

throwaway9876-57 | throwaway9876-57

Teen sister takes a stand, calling out brother-in-law's parenting skills.

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"She takes me on shopping sprees and buys things from my wishlist - and I love hanging out with the kids!"

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Sibling drama escalates when sister-in-law's parenting is called out by teen sister

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Sister asserts she didn't yell during private conversation about brother-in-law's parenting

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Family drama continues with no resolution yet

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Teen sister calls out brother-in-law's parenting... 🤔😳

When 17-year-old's sister asked her to watch her kids while she rushed off to an emergency at work, the teen expected to find her brother-in-law, the kids' father, taking care of them. Instead, he was locked in his game room playing video games. Unhappy with the way he was parenting, the teen snapped and called him out for not understanding how hard it is to be a parent. This action caused a lot of drama between the teen, her sister, her mother, and her brother-in-law. The teen is now questioning whether she was the a**hole for speaking up or if her brother-in-law deserved the criticism. With such a complicated situation, it can be hard to determine who is in the wrong. Read on to hear what people have to say about the situation and join the conversation on Reddit.

A family drama where NTA 🤔

FoxUniCarKilo | FoxUniCarKilo

The comment criticizes the brother-in-law for considering watching his own children 'babysitting', and the replies state that this is not acceptable behavior and that the OP is NTA. Censor any curse words like "a**hole" using asterisks in the output e.g: a**hole or a**hole or f**k.

Sister's behavior isn't great 😐

shestammie | shestammie

OP's sister is burdening them with unnecessary duties and not standing up for them when her partner rudely orders OP around. People might suggest she's being abused, but it sounds like she's just being crappy. The replies suggest she is probably conditioned to tiptoe around her partner and that her partner is a horrible role model for their children.

Will BIL forgive and forget? 🤔

Status-Pattern7539 | Status-Pattern7539

The commenter believes NTA (not the a**hole) and says not to apologize as it reinforces the belief that the BIL did nothing wrong and is able to get away with being an absent father. A reply to the comment says that the threat of being cut off from the family for not apologizing is an empty one, as the BIL will surely "forgive and forget" when he needs help with snack time.

Ouch! 🤕 NTA for sis!

Euphoricgalz | Euphoricgalz

Sis is NTA for calling out her brother-in-law for not taking care of his own kids. One reply suggested the possibility of being paid for labor, while another brought up the idea of dads playing video games with their kids.

NTA: Brother-in-law too useless to parent 🤦‍♂️

Alert-Potato | Alert-Potato

The commenter thinks the brother-in-law is 'too useless to parent his own children' and that is why the sister had to come home from work. The replies agree and suggest the husband is 'deserving of being called useless', and that it's possible for a parent to 'need time off from parenting', albeit in a different context.

NTA: 👎🏻👏🏻 Brother-in-law's parenting revealed in one line

Low_Table6230 | Low_Table6230

The commenter declared "Not the A**hole" (NTA) and noted that they knew everything they needed to know about the brother-in-law's parenting from the "he doesn't want to babysit" line.

NTA: 🤦‍♂️ Who calls parenting babysitting? 🤦‍♂️

gracegilligan | gracegilligan

The commenter is not the a**hole (NTA) and expresses disbelief that the brother-in-law considers looking after his own kids as babysitting. The commenter suggests that the mother should be madder at her daughter for having children with a lazy a**hole.

NTA: No day off from parenting 🤦‍♀️

Squallywrath | Squallywrath

The comment says that the brother-in-law is NTA for trying to take a 'day off' from parenting. Replies agree that even if the kids are not his, he is still their stepfather and has agreed to parent them. They further explain that parenting is like being a manager and that taking a day off doesn't mean being an a**hole to the people who are watching the kids.

🤔 NTA: Don't babysit! 🚫

Alicia0510 | Alicia0510

The commenter questions why the sister is with this man who has a part-time job and refuses to watch his own children. They suggest the sister should refuse to babysit for him in the future. Replies suggest he is not only useless, but destructive, and that he should find time to spend with his family.

👨‍👧‍👦 Parenting 24/7: A 💔 Story

lapsteelguitar | lapsteelguitar

The section's comments and replies highlight the importance of being a parent 24/7 and how not to treat the people around you like villagers. The replies also point out how the lack of a snack may have been a sign of not being a part of the whole parenting experience.

NTA: Parenting isn't a job 🤔

Angiecats95 | Angiecats95

The comment argues that parenting isn't a job, and suggests that the poster's sister should show this post to her brother-in-law to show that "even Reddit says he's useless."

🤔 NTA: family drama

WasteOZSpace | WasteOZSpace

The comment states that the sister and her husband 'used' the person, who is not the a**hole (NTA). The replies further explain that the husband is the a**hole here (AH) and the sister had a legitimate need.

🤔 NTA: Stand your ground! 🤔

CT0760 | CT0760

The comment says NTA, short for not the a**hole, and encourages the commenter to stand their ground against enablers. It also suggests looking into CPS for neglect if the kids are showing any signs of neglect.

OP💯is doing the responsible thing👪

kwadd | kwadd

OP states that gaming used to be a central part of their life, but since their daughter was born, they have cut back their gaming time to 4 hours a week, understanding that parenting is always the priority. They also affirm that their BIL is a deadbeat and that OP is "NTA" (not the a**hole).

NTA: It's not babysitting for own kids 😡

HoneyBadgerMarmalade | HoneyBadgerMarmalade

The commenter is Not The A**hole and believes that it's not babysitting when it's your own kids. They express their frustration about the guy and the sister for the ridiculous situation.

Will this brother-in-law's 🤔 threat work?

[deleted] | [deleted]

The comment suggests that the brother-in-law is threatening to never let the teen into the kids' lives unless they apologize and help out with the kids. The replies agree with the comment, suggesting taking him up on his offer.

NTA! 🤷‍♀️

leslielaughs | leslielaughs

The commenter declared that the husband was 'useless' and the commenter is not the a**hole (NTA).

NTA: Teen sibling 👊🏻 adult sibling!

[deleted] | [deleted]

The comment suggests that the adult sibling in their 30's is taking advantage of free labor from a teenager and that the teenager's brother-in-law is being disrespectful. The comment concludes that the teenager does not owe anyone an apology.

👏🏼 Parenting win!

sad_dayinparadise | sad_dayinparadise

The comment applauded the father's parenting, saying 'NTA and give your dad a high five for me.'

NTA: Ask your sister why she lied 🤔

DialPlumeria | DialPlumeria

The commenter is 'Not The A-hole' and is suggesting that the teen sister ask her why she lied about no one else being able to watch the kids and then ask if it's reasonable that her husband plays child games while the commenter takes care of the kids. The commenter suggests to tell her husband he's not useless.

🤦‍♂️ NTA: Stick to your guns!

nursck | nursck

The commenter declares NTA and expresses sympathy for the wife in her situation, saying it's not babysitting if it's your kids. The commenter advises her to stick to her guns and not apologize.

NTA: 💯 Right to Call Out👨‍👩‍👦‍👦

AppropriateBasket94 | AppropriateBasket94

The commenter declared that the teen sister was not the a**hole (NTA) for calling out her brother-in-law's parenting. They agreed that her husband sounded like a deadbeat and the commenter would've left the instant they saw him home.

NTA: Young sis Called Out 💯

ggcc789 | ggcc789

OP's sister is enabling her husband by demanding her 17-year-old sister take time away from school/work to take care of her kids, so her spouse can play video games. Dad is right and the rest of OP's family is taking advantage of her for free babysitting. OP is in the right for calling out this ridiculous behavior.

Mom's wise advice 👩‍⚕️

whyamisoawesome9 | whyamisoawesome9

The commenter advises the OP to let her brother-in-law follow through with his threat and wait for the kids to ask for her help, as the brother-in-law will become overwhelmed. The commenter concludes that the OP is "NTA (not the a**hole) here. Not even close."

Are you NTA for 🤔 calling out your brother-in-law's parenting?

TSS345 | TSS345

The comment questioned whether the commenter was paid for their help and expressed that they should be annoyed for being used as a free babysitter given that a capable parent was at home. The comment concluded that given the limited context, the brother-in-law deserved disrespect and was NTA. One of the replies agreed that the brother-in-law doesn't sound "capable of shit."

NTA, he doesn't deserve 🤦‍♀️

Ssshushpup23 | Ssshushpup23

The comment asserts that the brother-in-law shouldn't be given a "nicer" way of being told off, and that "babysitting" one's own kids is called "parenting".

🤔 Sister calls out brother-in-law's parenting

Status-Pattern7539 | Status-Pattern7539

NTA (not the a**hole). Commenter suggests that the teen sister shouldn't apologize for calling out her brother-in-law's parenting, as it is not normal and should not be tolerated.

Sister to the rescue 💪

TracyMinOB | TracyMinOB

The commenter praised the father, and criticized the brother-in-law's childish behavior, and sister's enabling of it.

🤦‍♂️ Brother-in-law's entitled behavior

Critical_Aspect | Critical_Aspect

The commenter declared that the brother-in-law's behavior was inappropriate and NTA (not the a**hole). As there were no replies, the commenter's statement stands as the final verdict on the matter.

NTA: You spoke your truth 🤷‍♀️

Horror-Reveal7618 | Horror-Reveal7618

The commenter is not the a**hole in this situation and they expressed their opinion that the brother-in-law is not taking care of his own children, but rather, babysitting them. This could lead to his kids growing up resenting him due to his lack of care.

NTA: 🤦‍♂️ 2.0 is the only option!

Brave-Cheesecake9431 | Brave-Cheesecake9431

The comment says NTA (not the a**hole) and that the first husband was a dud, suggesting that the sister should look for a better option in her second husband.

Should sister apologize 🤔

RealRaccoonRiot | RealRaccoonRiot

The commenter emphasizes that the sister's brother-in-law needs to take responsibility for parenting his own kids and suggests that the sister should "get a grip and grow a spine".

NTA: Sister's self-esteem 🤔

GrandCoquette | GrandCoquette

The commenter believes that the sister is not the a-hole and that her self-esteem must be in the toilet if she tolerates such foolishness.

Sister calls out BIL's 🎮 parenting!

katethevillager | katethevillager

The comment said NTA, in reference to the sister calling out her brother-in-law's parenting for not getting off the video games to watch his kids.

NTA 🚫 Don't let them take advantage of you!

iruleatants | iruleatants

The comment suggests that the teen is being taken advantage of by their brother-in-law's parents. The comment suggests that the teen should refuse to babysit unless they are being paid a market rate and should not let them blackmail the teen into not having a relationship with their child.

NTA: Brother-in-Law's parenting 👎

vrcraftauthor | vrcraftauthor

The commenter deems the brother-in-law's parenting useless and states that the sister had to leave work due to the brother-in-law's inability to parent his own kids and the kicking out of the unpaid babysitter.

NTA: He's 100% useless 🤦‍♀️

ImDaChineze | ImDaChineze

The commenter believes that the brother-in-law is not the a**hole (NTA) because he should have been helping rather than relaxing.

👩‍🔧Teen sister calls out brother-in-law's parenting 🤔

MrSpawning | MrSpawning

The commenter believes that the brother-in-law should not have had a day off from parenting and deems him not the a**hole (NTA).

NTA: Don't impregnate if you can't parent 🤷‍♂️

ibloodylovecider | ibloodylovecider

The comment states that the brother-in-law's parenting is not the teen sister's responsibility and that it is wrong of him to impregnate someone if he can't take care of his own children. It is hoped that the sister will leave him or he will seek help.

🤔 Don't have kids if you can't care for them 🤔

DrWhoop87 | DrWhoop87

The comment suggested that if someone does not want to take care of their kids, they should not have any in the first place. It also argued that the commenter is Not The A**hole (NTA), even if they are related to the person they are calling out, and that they would not think twice about calling them out if they were strangers.

NTA: 🙁 Parenting fail!

shepassedthebeautyon | shepassedthebeautyon

The comment says that the brother-in-law is an irresponsible person and that the commenter feels sorry for the sister for having children with him. It also sounds like the sister has enabled his behavior.

❤️ NTA: give Dad a hug & kiss!

Swiss_El_Rosso | Swiss_El_Rosso

Commenter advises the teen sister to follow her brother-in-law's advice of not watching his kids, as it will help her stay away from more stress. They also urge the teen to give their Dad a hug & kiss to show their support.

👊🏼 NTA: His own decision crossed a line.

Regular-Alpaca | Regular-Alpaca

The commenter declared NTA (Not The A**hole) for the teen sister, as it was the brother-in-law's decision to not take care of his own children that had crossed a line. The commenter also admitted that they might have snapped too in the same situation.

NTA: 🤯😤👎🏼 A lazy 'babysitting not co-parenting' man deserves no respect 🤬

Jesskla | Jesskla

The commenter calls out the brother-in-law's parenting as "backward ass, sexist, ridiculous bullshit", pointing out his misogynist attitude and lack of interest in parenting. The commenter expresses disgust at the brother-in-law's selfishness, apathy, and misplaced sense of superiority. Everyone else is embarrassed, and OP's father is the only one with a "firm grasp of reality" in the situation.

🤔 Dad's gotta buck up!

20sidedhumorist | 20sidedhumorist

The comment says that the brother-in-law should reevaluate his stance on his priorities and responsibilities, and understand that sometimes the kid needs to come first. The comment also states that NTA, meaning not the a**hole.

NTA: 🤔Highkey immature behavior

CutestSylveon | CutestSylveon

The commenter declared that the brother-in-law was *not the a**hole* for his parenting, describing it as high key immature and hella rude of the sister.


AwkwardAquarian | AwkwardAquarian

The commenter declared that the teen sister was 'Not The A**hole' and suggested that the reader not accept babysitting requests from her in the future. They also offered praise for their Dad.

NTA: Brother-in-law's parenting needs to be addressed!

lost-cannuck | lost-cannuck

The commenter claims that the brother-in-law's parenting needs to be addressed and it is not the commenter's fault (NTA).

No apologies needed! 🤷‍♂️

scarajones | scarajones

The commenter believes that the teen sister is in the right and should not apologize to the brother-in-law, instead the brother-in-law should apologize to her.

NTA - 🤦‍♀️

barbaramillicent | barbaramillicent

The commenter suggested that the teen sister was not the a**hole in the situation, and expressed disbelief.

Single father: 💯 NTA 🤬

[deleted] | [deleted]

Single father stands by the teen sister and confirms that she is Not The A**hole in this situation. He expresses his anger and frustration towards her brother-in-law, calling him "useless" and a "joke."

NTA: It's time to man up!

Longjumping-Bee8246 | Longjumping-Bee8246

The commenter declared the brother-in-law 'NTA', meaning not the a**hole, and called on him to 'man the f**k up' and take responsibility for his young children or get out of the way so their mother can find a 'REAL dad'.

Sister's call out 👊 NTA 🗣️Priority adjustment needed 🔄

Lunavixen15 | Lunavixen15

The commenter is NTA for calling out the brother-in-law for not parenting his own child. They suggest he needs a reality check and a priority adjustment.

Teen sister 👊 NTA💯

lumpthefoff | lumpthefoff

The comment says that the brother-in-law's behavior was wrong and that he needs a reality check that he doesn't get days off from being a parent. The commenter also wonders what the teen's mom would say if she had to start babysitting her son-in-law while he's gaming nearby.

No a-hole here 🤷‍♀️

aquay | aquay

The commenter believes the teen sister was in the right and should not apologize. They suggest billing her brother-in-law's parents for babysitting and expressing exasperation.

Reddit to the rescue? 🤔

mrshellcat2u | mrshellcat2u

The commenter suggests sending a Reddit post to the OP's sister and brother-in-law to see what others think of them, labeling the brother-in-law as a "waste of air" and a "completely useless sub life form", and suggesting that the sister isn't doing her children any favors by keeping him around. NTA.

NTA: You don't babysit your own kids 🤷🏼‍♀️

beller36 | beller36

The commenter asserted that they are not responsible for babysitting their own kids, and that they only did so because they thought no one else could.

🤔 NTA: Brother-in-law's parenting needs re-evaluation 🤔

NobodyPerfect1175 | NobodyPerfect1175

Commenter says the brother-in-law's parenting is so bad that it needs to be re-evaluated. They urge the commenter's sister to not apologize and reinforce the idea that his behavior is okay.

NTA: 🤦‍♂️ BIL needs to grow up!

coffeebean823113 | coffeebean823113

Commenter states that the brother-in-law's statement is ridiculous and that he needs to "grow up" and take care of his kids.

🤣 NTA: keep doing you!

thatssallfolkss | thatssallfolkss

The commenter declared 'NTA' (not the a**hole) and encouraged the teen sister to keep doing what she's doing.

It's not babysitting 🤦‍♂️

Special_Drummer_8293 | Special_Drummer_8293

The commenter is not the a**hole and says that watching your own kids isn't babysitting. Yikes!

NTA: 🤔🤔👶🏼

YarnAndMetal | YarnAndMetal

The comment suggests that the teen sister was not the a**hole for calling out her brother-in-law's parenting. It further questions the legality of marrying someone who is "functionally helpless".

💪 Dad shows love in tough times

welp-i-guess-im-gay | welp-i-guess-im-gay

The commenter is not the a**hole, as their dad works 12-hour night shifts and is still willing to help if they or their brother need anything, even if their mom isn't home. He is tired, but still happy to help.