Poor People Who Dated Rich People Shared What They Learned From The Experience

Ashley Hunte
Sunglasses and an empty water glass on a table in front of a pool.
Unsplash | Obi - @pixel6propix

For those of us who didn't grow up with excess wealth, we'll never truly understand what it's like. In fact, it almost seems like rich people live in an entirely different world than we do.

And when you end up dating someone who's a lot wealthier than you, you start to realize just how different your lives are. Which is why when Reddit user zipzap21 asked what poorer people learned after dating a rich person, many users had some surprising answers.

"My ex was having problems with roommates at university."

A nicely decorated condo kitchen.
Unsplash | Sidekix Media

"Her parents bought a $300000 condo for her to stay at while she finished her degree (2 years). They sold it for a profit immediately after. I can't imagine not only being able to solve my problems with money, let alone make more off of them."

"She also assumed her family was lower middle class because she didn't live in a mansion like her friends."

A grand, old, European-styled mansion.
Unsplash | Fabian Wiktor

"She was very humble and was smart with her money, but it was very clear she could just call her parents if something didn't work out. Meanwhile my parents were struggling to pay rent, meaning I was their fallback. Not the other way around." - Via MakeRobAPirate

"Dated a man who didn't work - lived off of a Trust Fund."

An expensive, high quality KitchenAid stand mixer.
Unsplash | Khajonkiet Noobut

"Oddly, since he could afford nearly anything - nothing had any value. He'd buy a $400 KitchenAid mixer - and burn it up making Christmas candy the first week. If he decided to make more candy - he'd just go buy another $400 mixer. Nothing meant particularly ANYTHING to him." - Via BlitheringEediot

"They don't really have a concept of how rich they are. My ex boyfriend was WEALTHY, but had a complex about how he was super poor."

A woman in a red dress holding incredibly large coins made of solid gold.
Unsplash | Alexander Grey

"It was because all of his friends were also so wealthy, and he was maybe marginally less rich than some of them, he considered himself on the lower end of the scale."

"They don't really have a point of reference for how poor some people are."

A person calculating on their phone, as if determining a budget.
Unsplash | Kelly Sikkema

"When we were together I was living on a food budget of £50 a month, and he absolutely could not wrap his head around how a person could spend that little."

"I lived with a horrendously rich friend, his family are aristocracy in his home country."

For some people, work is a luxury rather than a necessity.
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"One thing I've noticed about him is that he's completely incapable of grasping that if I stop working, I just stop being able to eat."

"He was confused about why I was worried about taking a week off work, and didn't understand I was worried I'd lose money."

A person hard at work on their laptop.
Unsplash | Christin Hume

"He seemed to think that most people work because they choose to, because he's never had to work." - Via lavenderacid

Man, I really wish I didn't have to work...

"People born into money think they know what it’s like to be middle class or poor."

A man sitting next to a sign that reads, "Hungry. Anything helps."
Unsplash | Steve Knutson

"...(and sometimes even can make it sound convincing) but they honestly aren’t even close to understanding. I’ve lived in three former meth labs as I grew up thinking McDonald’s was treating myself."

"I worked 40 hours a week at a gas station while taking 21 credit hours at a public university."

A run down apartment building. None of us will truly understand what it's like to be poor unless we've lived it.
Unsplash | Mika

"Now I’m a department lead engineer at a pharmaceutical company. When I hear the stories about all my gf’s rich classmates in a prestigious MBA program going to Europe for 'studying...'"

"...(really just taking Molly and clubbing all night while the school pays for it)..."

A row of different mansions on a street.
Unsplash | Daniel Barnes

"...I cringe like hell. They get snobby about if a job makes less than 6 figures and imply that’s low middle class (we’re in the Midwest where that’s upper middle class)." - Via raynorelyp

"I learned just how productive having money can be."

A person repairing a cellphone.
Unsplash | Kilian Seiler

"Something needs to be fixed/ replaced? We can afford to. Want to do something fun or adventurous? Sure let's do it now. Want to eat healthier? We can afford all the ingredients."

"Like what do you mean your life isn't slowed down by a million different things that need fixing/ upgrading/ replacing/ saved for?"

A small glass filled with coins and a sprouted plant.
Unsplash | micheile dot com

Via capricious_achelois

It must be nice to not ever have to worry about choosing between rent and getting your car fixed, or something like that.

"I only went on one date with him."

Lanes and lanes in a bowling alley.
Unsplash | Steven Cordes

"He booked out the entire bowling alley so we'd have privacy for our date. It just seemed so shockingly wasteful to me, and it was bizarre to have a 20-lane bowling alley just to the two of us plus a fair sized staff who were left with nothing to do but look after us."

"I learned I'm very uncomfortable with that level of casual assumption that the world will rearrange itself to suit my whims."

Several bowling balls of different colours and weights.
Unsplash | Marc Mueller

"Also he had absolutely no respect for personal space. I don't think he was used to women not liking to be touched by folks they barely knew." - Via MerylSquirrel

"I've thought about this a lot as someone who grew up poor, but has been in a number of relationships with women from upper or upper middle class castes."

A young woman flashing horn signs with her hands as she sits on a ledge with a mountain view.
Unsplash | Becca Tapert

"I think what it boils down to is that they have a kind of certainty in the idea that things will work out for them that I don't."

"Growing up, it felt like we were always at the precipice of catastrophe."

A person carefully repairing a wristwatch.
Unsplash | Matteo Vella

"I always felt that one wrong move would result in us losing our house or all of our money. As such, I kept immaculate care of things that I bought knowing that I could not replace any of it if it were gone."

"The women I've been in relationships with, though, seem to have none of this fear."

A person counting $100 bills.

"They always assume that things will work out. Plans don't need to be made because there's always some way to solve a problem with money. Objects don't get much respect because they're always readily replaceable."

"I always think about Nick Carraway's quote from 'The Great Gatsby:'"

Stacks and stacks of banknotes of different denominations.
Unsplash | Mufid Majnun

"'They were careless people, Tom and Daisy--they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made.'" - Via captain_flak

"Dated a girl for 3 years who came from old money."

A large house sequestered behind a wooded pathway.
Unsplash | Ibrahim Rifath

"She was fine but her family was beyond out of touch with the real world. They were nice people but incredibly removed from the rest of the world. They looked at me like I was zoo animal in the sense that they were so curious about my life/family. They'd ask me what it was like going to public school. How my parents immigrated."

"They were baffled that not everyone had vacation homes or traveled a lot."

All the clothes and accessories one would need for a beach vacation, strewn about atop an open suitcase.
Unsplash | Marissa Grootes

"The most interesting thing is that old money is much more powerful than new money. They belonged to these 'clubs' that consists of other rich families and the influence they had was mind-blowing. Want to build a factory in an area not zoned for it? Within a week that was changed." - Via edwadokun