Woman Who Was Made To Raise Younger Siblings Feels Conflicted About Moving Out

Mason Joseph Zimmer
children sitting outside on logs and rocks
youtube | Warner Bros. Home Entertainment

The world of parenting is something that so many of us are expected to enter, but also one it's almost impossible to feel adequately prepared for.

Not only are there are aspects of parenting that even the most thorough books and mentors won't warn you about, but there's also no parenting style that works the same for every kid.

But even when we take these challenges into consideration, we can still come to an agreement that there are people out there who really shouldn't be parents.

And when such people have multiple children, it's sadly not unheard of for the oldest of these children to end up filling the role of a parent unofficially when their own mothers and fathers shirk that responsibility.

And it's within that context that one young woman finds herself in a dilemma with no easy solutions.

The woman we're about to hear from is the oldest of five siblings with even her oldest brother being 11 years younger than her.

young woman kissing child's head with drawings behind them
youtube | Warner Home Video

As she explained in a Reddit post, these circumstances have made her feel like even more of a single mother than her mom as she is the one caring for her siblings, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of whatever else needs to be done around the house.

In her words, "Our Mum, I love her but she isn't great."

With this situation in mind, she is planning to start her own life by moving into an apartment with a friend, but feels conflicted about doing so.

woman looking angry in dark hallway
youtube | A24

Because while she badly craves her own opportunities, she's also deeply worried about how her siblings will fare without her.

Not helping these feelings is her mom, who said that she needs her there and that it's selfish of her to leave when she has responsibilities at home.

And since the oldest of her siblings is nine years old while the youngest is only 10 months old, they would be her responsibility for well over a decade beyond this point if she stayed behind.

As the woman put it, "I admit I lost it at that as I've been the only one to ever put my responsibilities first and I told her it's not my job to raise her kids."

children sitting outside on rocks and logs
youtube | Warner Bros. Home Entertainment

This not only led the mom to call the woman entitled and spoiled, but to tell her other children that she'll be leaving them behind as she's "too interested in herself."

In the woman's words, "That was a bombshell she dropped before flaunting off to go party and I spent the entire night trying to console them."

Nonetheless, a big part of her is wondering if there's something to what her mother is saying.

Although it was evident to the Reddit community she reached out to that she's not the problem in this situation, it was hard for them to provide much satisfying advice.

Randy Marsh flies with his head on a butterfly's body
Giphy | South Park

As one user said, "What are you supposed to do… never move out of the house? Your youngest sibling is 3; are you supposed to remain at home caring for your siblings well into your 30s? You deserve your own life, and these are not your children."

But while others agreed and believed she should be able to move out as she desires, they did agree that her siblings' situation has an uncertain future considering who their mother is.

Nonetheless, another person tried to offer a workable solution, saying, "After you leave, call CPS. Explain the situation. They should keep tabs on your siblings and make sure they're safe. If she ever leaves them alone or puts them in a bad situation, call the police. It isn't your job to raise them, but you CAN do your best to make sure they're safe without you."

h/t: Reddit | Few_Blood1369