Living at home can be a blessing and a curse, especially when your family is financially dependent on you. A 22-year-old woman has been living with her entire family, including her retired parents, sisters, their husbands, and children. She’s been secretly saving money while her family thinks she’s attending community college. But now, she’s planning to move out without telling her family, leaving them in a financial bind. Is she being selfish, or is it time for her to put herself first? Let’s dive into her story.
The Crowded Family Home
Entitled Sister & Financial Demands
Money Requests & Identity Theft
Dropping Out & Secret Work Life
Hidden Higher Salary
Saving for an Escape ♀️
Feeling Guilty & Family Finances
Sister’s Money Requests & Parents’ Struggle
The Big Move & Financial Impact
Abandoning the Sinking Ship?
TLDR: Secret Plans & Financial Support
Edit: Surprised by Support & Plan Update
The Deal with Parents
The Great Escape: A Secret Plan & Family Drama ️♀️
Caught between her love for her family and her desire for independence, our 22-year-old protagonist has been secretly saving money while her family believes she’s attending college. She’s planning to move out without telling them, leaving them in a financial lurch. Feeling guilty about her decision, she wonders if she’s doing the right thing. After receiving an outpouring of support, she’s decided to tell her parents about her plans, on the condition that they don’t tell her sisters. If the deal is broken, she’ll move out sooner than planned. Let’s see what the internet thinks of this situation…
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NTA for not wanting to pay rent, but should talk to parents.
Taking care of yourself is important. NTA for moving out
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User asks about cultural expectations on women and receives honest response.
Leaving home without telling family, commenters advise caution and planning
Generous but not obligated to donate money to family. NTA
Move out and live your life, don’t let guilt trap you
NTA, save yourself and let your parents see sister’s actions
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Commenters call out entitled family members for mooching off OP.
Standing up for yourself and your finances
NTA, tough love for enabler parents
Don’t enable irresponsibility, move out and live your life!
Prioritizing self-care is not selfish. NTA, OP!
Take control of your life, don’t let anyone guilt you
Don’t let entitled family guilt you. You’re NTA
Take control of your life! You’re not responsible for everyone.
User suggests drastic action against sister’s fraud.
NTA, pay rent, support family, go live drama-free
Earned your money, pay your rent, and move out. NTA
Sibling relying on OP as ATM, NTA for lying about income
NTA, but tough love may be necessary for your own well-being
Family financial responsibility questioned in NTA comment section
Choosing yourself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary
Woman feels guilty about lying to family about income and moving out
NTA for bettering yourself and potentially helping your parents later
Commenter sympathizes with OP and calls out entitled siblings.
Sassy commenter calls out clueless sisters and enabling parents.
Moving out doesn’t mean abandoning family, NTA.
Be honest, but give them time to adjust
Empowering response to woman’s decision to leave family in secret.
Breaking free from toxic family, NTA gets support
NTA. Concerned about parents being taken advantage of by siblings. Need boundaries.
NTA, but therapy may help with family complications. Best wishes!
Putting yourself first isn’t selfish. Don’t let guilt manipulate you.
NTA. Move out for your wellbeing. Your sisters are parasites
NTA. Family parasites need to pay rent or get out
Family obligations go both ways. NTA for cutting ties.
Breaking free from family leeches. NTA.
NTA. Sister’s financial issues are not OP’s responsibility
Free and clear! NTA gets supportive advice to leave.
Secret savings and family drama: NTA’s tips for helping out
Live your best adult life! NTA for not owing money.
Sibling struggles and enabling parents, NTA gets support
NTA: Your finances are your own. Nobody is entitled to them
Commenter questions house size and supports OP’s decision.
Not the a**hole, but secrets can have consequences ♀️
Honesty is the best policy, even if it’s uncomfortable
NTA! Support for moving out and sister’s lack of responsibility.
Sibling drama over money and rent. NTA for moving out
NTA. OP kindly advises parents to seek help from working adults.
NTA advises being honest with family and firm with sisters
Sister wants money, but commenter is NTA for protecting parents
Time to fly the nest and leave the family drama
Leaving a toxic family situation: NTA, focus on your future
Enabling siblings? NTA moves out and enjoys new place
Commenter receives validation for their opinion
Don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm
Cheers to living your best life!
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Sister lies about income, commenters question family’s finances. NTA.
User suggests NTA and jokingly admits to being a horrible person
Sister’s husbands are the real a**holes in this situation
Putting yourself first is important , but honesty is key
Supportive comment encourages self-care and dismisses potential guilt.
NTA calls out enabling parents and advises OP on ID theft
Encouraging reply to OP’s decision to move out and become independent
NTA, but what about the identity theft?
Take care of yourself first, start a savings bond for kids
Escape before becoming primary provider. #NTA
NTA hides income from family due to lack of trust
Taking control of your finances is important, but be cautious!
Standing up for yourself and your finances
Moving out doesn’t mean you stop helping your parents. NTA
Commenter applauds OP for leaving enabling parents.
