20 Things That Make A Man Instantly Unattractive, According To Reddit Users

Attraction is about way more than a person's physical appearance. The overall way a person presents themselves, regardless of how they look, generally makes an impression.

For men who are looking to be more attractive to potential romantic partners, the r/AskReddit thread "What instantly makes a man unattractive?" is a great place to start.


Unsplash | Jametlene Reskp

"I remember I dated someone who would just lie to make himself sound cool. I remember when his coworker was telling a hilarious story that I thought happened to my boyfriend and i instantly had this pit in my stomach. Biggest turn off."



Unsplash | ahmed zid

"I know this dude who is like a solid ten in all departments. I constantly joke that he's gonna steal my man, my mom, and the [expletive] cats too.

But the other day he was sharing his rebound stories and kept talking about he was gonna 'break hearts' and 'ruin her'.

I was like...bro eeeeew never let a woman hear you say that. You just turned into a sack of potatoes!"

Bad hygiene.

"Well, let me tell you that the folks that actually get in my pants don't think that's meme level advice. Basics, like clothes that fit and non-stinky breath, can go so far in making anybody way more attractive and approachable!"


Bashing their ex.

Unsplash | Mikel Parera

"Something to remember is you're not actually replacing your ex. You're experiencing someone new. They aren't a different version of your ex, but a whole new person. They will have some similarities and some differences, but they're an entirely new entity, experiencing a different life. They're not a newer model of a car."


Being lousy to people they're not attracted to.

"Treating women who they don't find attractive poorly. I think it says all I need to know about them as a human."


"It's such a red flag that just screams 'I'm actually a misogynist, and my kindness is performative!'"


Belittling people based on their salary.


"My brother does this in conversations where salary is completely irrelevant. He doesn't even make a lot of money. But you can't get through a conversation with him without him trying to come across superior."


Speaking over others and one-upsmanship.

"'You think that’s rude lemme tell you about this one person ..' .

I hate it when people speak over others and are always one- upping as well . To me it wreaks of insecurity."


Living in the past.

"Talking about how hot they used to be like this coworker of mine does.

'I used to bike 10 miles a day, do 200 pushups in one go, and I even used to have a V, you know...down there.'

I'm just trying to send this email, Doug. Please leave me alone."


Not brushing their teeth.

Unsplash | National Cancer Institute

"My ex didn't brush his teeth for like a decade. He told me it started out as him just being a kid who couldn't be bothered, but eventually it got too painful for him when he tried."


Gross table manners.

"I remember a date I had with a guy almost 25 years ago. I remember it because we went out to eat at a local pizza restaurant. In the time it took me to eat half a slice, he had vacuumed up the rest of the pie which included loud, open-mouth chewing and belching. Chunks of food landed on his shirt. There were snuffling sounds as he shoved food down his maw. I don't remember anything else about that night but his disgusting method of eating. Total deal killer."


Putting others down for a laugh.

Unsplash | Heidi Walley

"'Banter' as we Brits call it. I hate it, why the hell is telling someone how stupid/ugly they are in public (and private) meant to be fine because it's just 'bants'? And if you can't 'take' the ridicule then you're branded as the oversensitive idiot.

It's a part of our culture that I think is really nasty and needs to be thrown out."



"Insecurity that they try to mask by overcompensating. I.e 'A real man only drinks Coors', excessive humor at other people's expense, putting other people down to make themselves feel big (like lording around waitstaff) or talking at length about how great/strong/badass they are. Real inner strength and security isn't shouty about anything."


Bragging about questionable things.

"Bragging about how little you do for your kids. I know it sounds ridiculous but I’ve had several men do this while flirting.

One was flirting with me while at Target, I was buying diapers for the kids I nanny. And as we’re flirting he just casually goes 'yeah I don’t do diapers'. You don’t!? Then who does? You’re going to make your spouse do all of them?"


Won't admit they're wrong.

Unsplash | Priscilla Du Preez

"Ooooof. This so much. I am attracted to smart guys, but do you know how you get smart? You let yourself be corrected when you're wrong. If someone won't ever let themself be corrected, I just presume that they know next to nothing because they're immune from learning."


Being rude to servers.

"Being rude to waitstaff or thinking they are beneath him. Being rude in general, but I can't stand when people aren't grateful or thankful for people working in the service industry."


"I have no tolerance for people who are rude to other people just trying to do their job"


Feats of destructive strength.

Unsplash | Usman Yousaf

"Being destructive particularly when other dudes or other people are near by.

Breaking things on purpose, hitting things that shouldn't be hit like walls or windows or destroying other people's art/property. It doesn't make you cool or strong it makes you a wasteful jerk I won't invite back into my life ever again."


Being a baby about healthy food.

Unsplash | Louis Hansel

"Refusing to eat anything even slightly healthy, like green vegetables. I don’t mind people having preferences of course, but when I sit down to eat something like broccoli and salmon and a man sees it and proceeds to make a huge stink about how disgusting it is….that’s lady mace right there."


Being a know-it-all.

"When he automatically assumes he’s smarter than you, or the infuriating need to always seem like he knows more about a subject than you, doesn’t matter what it is (men do this with other men too, but especially with women)."


Being pushy.

Unsplash | Andrew Neel

"Being too pushy. One of my ex boy friends was constantly bringing up sleeping with me and even tried to coax me into his apartment/car later at night, eventually it got to the point where i had to break up and threaten him after he was harassing me."


Bullying people for their appearance.

"Making fun of others for the way they look, especially if the person they're making fun of is fat. I was bullied for being fat growing up. There's no way in hell that I'd want to be around a grown man who acts like a mean teenager"