I'm not sure who decided that a day dedicated to being thankful for what you have should be immediately followed by tearing each other apart for what you don't, but I admire their cruel sense of irony.

At best, Black Friday is a stressful, cranky shopping experience that might save you some money. 

At worst, the people on this list will show up to the party and it will be total mayhem.


Advertisement

1. The person who has been training for this day for way too long.

1. The person who has been training for this day for way too long.
Instagram |  @girlsthinkimfunny

This ain't their first rodeo. Year after year, they've been hardened a little more by Black Friday sales and now know the exact technique for wrestling a TV out of someone's hands.

2. The one who manages to get a little too attached to the merchandise.

The store employees are having a hard enough time focusing on staying alive and appeasing the zombie horde without wriggling someone's arm out of a speaker.

Now is not the time to experiment.

Advertisement

3. The folks using this chaotic day to finesse a little something.

3. The folks using this chaotic day to finesse a little something.
Instagram |  @will_ent

I'm not knocking people's hustle, but I'm not falling for it when they flop to the ground like a soccer player after I brush against them. 

There's probably a fist fight nearby if they're so eager.

4. The people with absolutely no idea what they just signed up for.

4. The people with absolutely no idea what they just signed up for.
Reddit |  emtcj

See, I can't see the panicked, vulnerable looks on their faces without feeling a responsibility to protect them. Trust me, that makes it really hard to focus on all the dynamo deals.