14+ People With Less Than Zero Chill

Diply 22 Oct 2018

Don't get me wrong, I'm all in on people being extra. But sometimes, there's something to be said for tempering that extra-ness with a little bit of chill. Without a dash of chill to balance you out, you might end up going overboard, and nobody wants that. Right?

1. This is the kind of joke that gets your horse taken away from you.

Reddit | Awkward_Dog

At least, I'm assuming it's a joke and these kids aren't actually being terribly mistreated by this horse. See? Even I'm confused about it. And I do funny for a living.

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2. Well, this is just obnoxious.

Reddit | Goal1

Speaking of obnoxious, I ran the math on this to see what the best deal actually is, and once you hit 25 wings, you're pretty much paying $1.11 per wing. The weird part is that from 29–45, it actually bumps up to $1.12 per wing. It's madness.

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3. No one does passive-aggressive quite like antivirus software.

Reddit | aaronbowers

It's like when you try to read the news online and a popup shows up being like, "Do you want to join our mailing list or do you want to live your life in the overwhelming of darkness, you idiot?"

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4. Putting the "pump" in pumpkin.

Reddit | rishinerevetla

The original post on Reddit was actually captioned "Jacked-O-Lantern," and, frankly, I'm not clever enough to beat that, so you got what you got.

Think you can do better? Swole-o-ween? Does that work?

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5. With two, I'd go "neat," but three is a bit much, don't you think?

Reddit | SomeIdiotCalledDice

Then again, if this happened in Australia, I'd actually be even more excited. So maybe I just need to be the one to chill out a bit.

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6. You thought you could mess with the band geeks and they'd just stand there and take it?

Reddit | A-wild-meme

No sirree. They've all come together to form a Megazord-type monstrosity that's absolutely ready to kick some brass.

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7. Sometimes the most important thing to do on Tinder is to stand out from the crowd.

Reddit | PopcornFanatic

With no offense at all to Danny DeVito, I would have never guessed that using his face would help a woman out on Tinder, but here we are.

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8. When you're super in to Cars, but you still want to stunt.

Reddit | TheShadowDemon247

How would you even go about getting this done? Is there some custom car designer out there who specializes in this sort of thing?

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9. Actual footage of my relationship with carbs.

Reddit | DrunkHaggis

I'm one of those bad vegetarians who knows that I should be eating more beans and lentils and stuff, but instead I just gorge on pizza and Apple Cinnamon Cheerios.

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10. When your parrot realizes they're not the ones paying the hydro bill.


Look at it! It knows exactly what it's doing. It's so cheeky about it, too.

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11. Well, that's just embarrassing.

Reddit | Totitive

Maybe I'm just not a considerate person, but I don't think I've ever felt compelled by somebody's service in a McDonald's to go out of my way to comment about them on Google.

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12. And speaking of weirdness at a McDonald's.

Reddit | tanzaniteflame

Just how many McCafé stamp cards have you filled up with this? Are you building a sculpture? Are you just trying to prove a point? How badly does your car smell like stale coffee?

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13. Halloween is just about the one time of year where you can actually get away with having no chill.

Reddit | Petaaa

Plus, if you're like these kids, you might teach people a thing or two about history along the way.

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14. Sometimes, inspiration can come from the most unexpected places.

Twitter | @AshleyJPL

Even just the Jack Johnson part. When was the last time that you just hung out with his brand of chill tunes? Treat yourself.

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15. Well, thanks for that, I guess?

Reddit | leafconsumer

Sometimes it's nice to just check in with yourself and find out that everything is going A-okay, y'know? I don't actually know what that feels like, but it sounds good.

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16. Just how big was this key, exactly?

Twitter | @TrashyeWest

That's like...the key to a city. Or the keyblade from Kingdom Hearts or something. Oh wait, somebody's lying on the internet again, aren't they? I hate when people do that.

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