15 Vintage Products That'll Make You Say, 'Thank God It's 2018'

Diply 25 Aug 2017

Before Roombas and selfie sticks, the world was a very different place. Our great grandparents had the grand opportunity to use some of the wildest gadgets we've ever seen, both for fun and functionality.

Keep scrolling to see some of these whacky and wonderful inventions!

1. This old-school hairdryer makes very little sense in the modern world.

Dominio Mundial | Dominio Mundial

But back in the day, it was filled with hot water and brushed through wet hair — using the heat from the water to dry the hair.

Load Comments

2. Beauty Micrometer

Lela London | Lela London

This contraption looks like it was used for lobotomies, but its history is much less extreme. It was actually used to determine the correct amount of makeup to minimize or maximize features.

Load Comments

3. An entire stand dedicated to shaving, because who needs sinks?

eBay | stantonsburgantiques1

Actually, this should still be a thing because everyone's tired of tiny hairs scattered all over the bathroom.

Load Comments

4. Checking the date used to be much more beautiful than today's slide-to-unlock method.

Pinterest | Paris Hotel Boutique 

Then again, who wants to be in charge of changing the date every day? Count me out!

Load Comments

5. This vial was used to collect the tears of loved ones after someone's passing.

Pinterest | Pinterest

This is both lovely and cryptic. Did they wear their own tears as a necklace? Did these vials get buried with them? So many questions.

Load Comments

6. Sometimes we have great technological advances... 

Roba da Donne | Roba da Donne

And sometimes we create mechanisms to turn eggs into cubes — because square eggs taste better? Just like Coca-Cola tastes better from a glass bottle.

Load Comments

7. These cone-shaped plastic covers were used to protect makeup from the weather. 

Roba da Donne | Roba da Donne

This is all pre-Urban Decay setting spray — but doesn't a massive plastic cone kind of take away from getting your face did?

Load Comments

8. We've heard of wearing sweatsuits and garbage bags during cardio to get that extra sweat going...

The Things | The Things

But these shorts are literally pool floaties — I suppose they served the same purpose, though.

Load Comments

9. Maybe not your great grandparents, but some of your ancestors definitely tried slayin' vamps in their day.

The Ghost Diaries | The Ghost Diaries

This antique vampire-hunting kit looks straight outta a movie — Bible and stakes included.

Load Comments

10. Next time you reach for a toothpick, just know that somewhere in the world, this extremely sharp hook was used to do the same thing.

V and A | V and A

Everything used to be so extra.

Load Comments

11. The precursor to noise-cancelling headphones.

Imgur | Imgur

Though it comes off more like a head-jail, the Isolator promised to eliminate outside noise and allow the user to "concentrate with ease upon the subject at hand."

Load Comments

12. The original self-tanner — the Suntan Vending Machine.

So Bad So Good | So Bad So Good

For a ridiculous price like 15 cents, you could get a spray tan whenever your heart desired — all you'd have to do is find the corner this was sitting on.

Load Comments

13. The Vibra-Finger... For stimulating your gums, of course.

Neatorama | Neatorama

Because that's for sure what people were using it for. It definitely would make a "different and useful gift," though.

Load Comments

14. Teacups customized for men with mustaches.

Pinterest | Pinterest

Imagine living in a time when mustaches were such a valued part of society that people kept these cupstaches on hand? It's a crazy world, fellas.

Load Comments

15. This should still be a popular product — toastable bacon strips!

Imgfave | Imgfave

Poptarts would go out of business so fast! Though all that bacon grease would go to waste in your toaster...

Load Comments

Did we miss an item your great grandparents would have used in their day-to-day lives?

Giphy | Giphy

Let us know what they were in the comments, and don't forget to LIKE and SHARE!

Load Comments
Next Article