Reddit | Gracynvh

10+ Times Birds Were Absolute Jerks

Amy Pilkington 24 Aug 2019

Birds are jerks. There, I said it. They're adorable, but jerks all the same.

And I'm not just talking about seagulls and Canada Geese. All birds, if given the chance, will show their true colors.

If that wasn't true, why would there even be a subreddit called r/BirdsBeingDicks in the first place?

1. We've all gotten a bird poop or two on our car due to their lack of respect for property, but this bird goes a step farther.

Reddit | DeLoreanMotorCars

According to the Redditor that shared this pic, the bird specifically waits for this car to arrive and then spends all day preening itself in that mirror.

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2. I said it wasn't just geese and seagulls that deserve to be called jerks, but they still fall under that category.

Reddit | cu_alt

Look at this goose that was blocking the road. It is affronted that the human and their car tried to drive down the street.

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3. No really, use the other door. They aren't joking.

Reddit | tabbyexe

There's a whole section of my local university's campus that gets roped off during nesting season because the geese have seriously injured students.

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4. Day ruined in 3... 2... 1...

Reddit | MissGymlow

I know I'm assigning intent where there probably isn't any, but look at that expression. That's the look of someone going, "Watch this!"

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5. This isn't about to ruin your day. It's about to ruin your year.

Reddit | spiceguys

I can't decide if I want to warn the cat about what's about to happen or if I want to warn the bird to stop if it values its feathers.

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6. If my dogs were birds, they would have done this to my laptop a long time ago.

Imgur | kaitkait

Those puppers really don't like when I work from home and spend more time paying attention to my computer than them.

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7. Perhaps this bird was just trying to add a decorative pattern?

Reddit | mike_pants

Despite myself, I actually love how the prints almost look intentional. If only that damn bird hadn't lost focus so close to the end.

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8. Redditor spx1e said, "sister wanted to pet chicken, chicken disagreed."

Reddit | spx1e

This is a spectacular action shot. The kid has only just realized what's about to happen, closing her eyes but not yet raising her hands to block the jerk chicken.

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9. "Basically a summary of what it's like to own a bird." — Gracynvh

Reddit | Gracynvh

My younger sister loves animals and basically tried every kind of pet at least once. I can confirm that this is true and that my parents put the kibosh on any future avian pets.

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10. This image is very unsettling. It almost looks like a filter gone horribly wrong.

Reddit | tinytoebeans0709

But according to Redditor tinytoebeans0709m it was "a pelican trying to eat [their] phone."

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11. Though in the scheme of things, a phone isn't that bad compared to trying to eat your cat.

Reddit | MagTron14

I really wish there was more follow-up to this image. Like, I don't think the pelican could actually lift that cat, but I really just want to know how the cat feels about the whole thing.

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12. You knew there had to be at least one seagull in this list, right?

Reddit | BurvelBillWithFriend

How about two in the most perfectly timed image ever taken.

I love how it looks like one is acting as the distraction why the other goes for the food.

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