Trust is everything in a relationship. Once that's broken, it's extremely difficult to get it back.
So it was extremely upsetting for one wife who discovered that her husband ran a background check on her before they got married.
This is some You-level stuff! She even learned disturbing things she didn't know about her friends and family.
Keep reading to see how she reacted.
She began by saying that she and her husband have been married for three years.
She only just recently found out that he ran a background check on her and her family before they got married.
She had been using her laptop since she left hers at home when she came across a folder with her name on it.
"The folder was full of reports on me, my family (including extended family) and two of my childhood friends."
This discovery put her in a whirlwind of emotions.
"At first, I was just hurt he would do something like this without talking to me first."
"It’s hard to put it into words but I felt like I had gone cold all over but also like it wasn’t me reading these things."
"At first, he tried to say it wasn’t a big deal and his cousin chimed in to say it was normal and he wasn’t the only one who had done it in their family."
But she didn't want to go anywhere with him, so she told him she was leaving.
"My husband told me to stay and he would sleep somewhere else." In the end, she spent a night in a hotel alone.
Because of her reaction, she's wondering if she took things too far and if she's the one wrong here.
But Reddit swiftly let her know that wasn't the case. "Its creepy just creepy behaviour," one commented.
"I think the worst part is that either the idiot didn't even think on deleting that information OR he's keeping the information for some reason," they wrote.
"It's been three years, presumably he made that research before marrying... because if he made it more recently, that's even worse somehow."
Another stated the obvious: that this crosses pretty much every boundary.
"NTA blatant disrespect and breach of any boundaries it would be one thing is you were aware and agreed for yourself but your family and friends ??!" they wrote, adding that this is a massive red flag.
This Redditor pointed out that some light research is normal in dating.
How many of us have internet stalked a date before the meeting or taken a look at their mother's FB profile?
"I don’t think it’s super unusual to do a background check on someone, but the fact that it’s your family, extended family, and friends leads me to believe that this is some YOU-level stalky BS., and I’d freak out too."
H/T: Reddit
