Many times in marriages, couples disagree on a lot of things. From things to spend money on to ways to raise their kids, couples disagree on a lot and it can cause some tension between the two of them.
However, not all couples can resolve their problems, and many of them last a long time. So, they seek outside advice from others.
After your parents spend their whole life raising their kids, the kids turn around and want to pay it forward and help them in their old age. When your parents can no longer take care of themselves, you want to step in and help them.
Someones, one person wants to have their parents move in and help them out, while another person said they don't want that. This can put a wedge between a husband and wife if they both disagree on what they want for their home and their family.
A husband asked the Reddit community for advice when he and his wife began to disagree about her mother moving in with them. The husband said that after his parents passed, he inherited their house. When he and his wife got married, they decided to move into the home with their two kids.
The husband said that both kids had their own rooms and the house was roomy enough for all of them to live there comfortably. They got a dog and have a yard and everything. But, the husband also has a "man cave" in the basement where he can escape.
However, the husband was concerned about it, especially because they didn't have an extra room for her mother in the house. So, the wife suggested that they turn the basement into a mother-in-law suite for her. The husband was not happy about that.
The husband said he had been spending years trying to perfect the man cave so that it has everything that the wants in it. And, he wasn't super happy to be giving up the man cave and said "no."
The husband said instead of having his MIL move into the basement, he would have the two kids share a room again and then give the other bedroom to the MIL. That way, everyone gets their own room (except the two kids who share a room).
His wife said it was selfish and wrong of him to have her kids give up their rooms but he wouldn't give up his "man cave." He explained that it was his one place that was just his and that it's not right to make him give up the space he worked so hard on.
Some people said that he wasn't a jerk, but instead, he was "selfless" because in the matter of a few years, he got married, moved his wife and her two kids into his home, and uprooted his life—plus, he was agreeing to now allow his MIL to move in, too. He "deserves" a place of his own in "his own home."
Others believed he was in the wrong, because when you marry someone you are not just marrying them, you're marrying their whole family—kids and in-laws and all. Many said he should 100% give up the man cave and let his MIL have the basement.
There seems to be those who are in the middle, too. Some say that he is right for wanting his space but also he's wrong for saying it's "my house" and not "our house," because his wife will never feel like an equal.
Where do you stand on this one?
