Dad At Wits End Because Wife Thinks He Can Child-Mind While Working From Home

For parents, dividing the labor can be a tricky proposition.

A Redditor recently asked for the internet's judgment on the situation he and his wife are currently in.

The long and short of it is that OP has a work-from-home job that occupies him from 5am to 7pm, six days a week.

His wife wants more help with their kid, and he says he's too busy with work.

Things changed when he started working from home.

Unsplash | XPS

"My wife has struggled with the idea that the location of my job has changed but my responsibilities have not. I've had several discussions with her about the fact that even though I'm home now I'm not able to watch our son during the day, or explaining why I can't get to the dishes till that evening," he writes.

"She will nod along, too, but I don't think she really believes it."

OP's wife wants to spend time with her friends on Friday.

Unsplash | Gabriel Gurrola

OP said he can't free himself up to give his wife some leisure time.

"She gets angry at me, saying she watches our son every day while I just 'sit in my office from sun up to sundown,' and how I should be able to watch our son so she can have a day off."

So what's the verdict?

The top comment says OP isn't in the wrong, exactly, but that working 14 hours a day, six days a week "is simply not sustainable for ANY family or marriage."

Various other commenters said the same thing. It's one thing to be a provider, but it's another to be so wrapped up in work that you have no time for family.

Maybe OP is in the wrong.

Unsplash | Rietveld Ruben

"You work from 5am to 7pm everyday? She is also working from 5am to 7pm taking care of the house and child without help. And hasnt had a Saturday without your child for FOUR YEARS?" asked one incredulous commenter.

"In the moment, she could probably have handled things better, but that kind of work schedule is going to kill your marriage."

"Working 84 hours a week also leaves your wife as a solo parent 84 hours a week."

This comment gently chides OP for working too much. While he isn't intentionally being malicious to his wife, he seems oblivious to the toll his work hours are taking on their marriage.

"Adjusting schedules or jobs isn't something that can be done on a dime, but please consider looking toward a point where this can change," they conclude.

They need more help.

Unsplash | Tim Mossholder

Surely 84 hours a week is enough to pay for a babysitter, right?

"I understand you can not watch children while you’re working," wrote a commenter. "But your wife is burnt out and needs a break from being around a child constantly. Hire a babysitter every once in a while so she can have some free time. You guys should have some dates too!"

What do you think?

While opinions varied, the overwhelming consensus seemed to be that OP is working waaay too much.

How would you handle this situation if it was happening in your marriage? Be sure to let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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