Reddit | knoerifast13

Women Share Their Epic Comebacks To Creepy Men Online

mason.zimmer 7 Feb 2019

No matter how far we come along as a society, it still seems like some of us still can't shake the attitude that not being able to take "no" for an answer is a good thing.

Sure, it might be effective (if frustrating to deal with) in a sales environment, but it can only lead to aggravation and discomfort when someone tries to apply it to the dating world.

Sadly, it's an issue that a lot of women have to deal with on a regular basis.


However, some of them have taken this daily irritation as an opportunity to get creative and mess with the people creeping them out.

And the results are hilarious.

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Well, at least one of the people in this conversation is giving an accurate measurement.

Reddit | monathemantis

It's hard not to imagine the guy who fell for this ruler trick looking up an average size, doubling it, and then thinking he could create mystery and intrigue by spouting out "what u wanna see?"

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Thirsty dudes looking for nudes beware because this is likely what they'll have to look forward to most of the time.


Not that it'll help matters that much if they get specific, but it's probably time to change tactics if they see this cat enough to give it a cute nickname.

For instance, not asking strangers for nudes is a solid plan.

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This started poorly and somehow managed to get worse and worse.

Imgur | Ififsandbuttswerecandyandnutswedallhaveawonderfulchristmas

Her first answer made it clear that she wasn't interested. Just move on, dude.

At first I thought he was just copying and pasting the same message over and over, but judging by how the question marks move, he's actually typing it each time.

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Getting someone to realize they're being creepy may not work, but this woman has definitely perfected the art of making them feel dumb.

Before long, she'll probably be able to beat her high score of time spent before they realize what's going on. Sadly, the only prize is a declining faith in humanity.

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I don't know why I find this one so funny.

Something about Jon's simple "Damn" and disappointed emoji just gets me every time I see it.

I don't even know how someone would actually answer that question. Like, if I said Canada, where would that fit on the scale?

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Yeah, it's pretty unclear what response this smooth operator was hoping to get with that last message.

Reddit | knoerifast13

Unless there's a website dedicated to naughty thermostats that I'm not aware of, it looks like somebody should've just realized when to admit defeat.

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Yes, because what every woman wants is to be compared to a dog in the first message.

Imgur | Ififsandbuttswerecandyandnutswedallhaveawonderfulchristmas

And dude, maybe you shouldn't have led with Petco. It doesn't exactly scream "luxury leather collar." It you're going to try this, at least namedrop the fanciest, most expensive pet store you can think of.

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Yeah, this seems like the exact reaction most people would have to a request for a picture of their "now."

Reddit | neva-electra

Apparently, that's not what he wanted, but he didn't have much hope of ending up as anything but her "back then" anyway.

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Ouch, it sounds like this guy would've had a lot more luck if he actually sent her a recipe.

Reddit | ConfuzzledGummyBear

Nothing lets you know you've done your job well quite like getting blocked by the guy who wasn't welcome in the first place.

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Why do people think this is a good way to start a conversation?

Tumblr | flying-icecream

You've already matched. Just introduce yourself and maybe give a few fun facts about you that don't include measurements. There's only one correct response to this guy's question, and she got it right on the first try.

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Sometimes, the best comeback is silence.

Imgur | Ififsandbuttswerecandyandnutswedallhaveawonderfulchristmas

I'll give Taylor some credit here: they spelled "you're" right and everything is capitalized. That's a diamond in the rough.

But I can't get rid of the mental image of them sitting and staring at their phone as Christmas slowly ticks by.

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Ooh, this is definitely a rookie mistake when it comes to using up one of your three wishes.


If there's room to give you what you literally asked for without it being what you obviously want, it's time to rewrite the wish.

Note that this strategy only works on genies.

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Getting curved must sting hard enough without the part where they realize she also out-rhymed them.

Reddit | katebjerre

If it starts with "roses are red," a limerick is going to beat it every time. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

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This is what happens when you give up on the pick-up line halfway through.

Imgur | Ififsandbuttswerecandyandnutswedallhaveawonderfulchristmas

That line is classically awful, but if you're trying to put a new spin on it, this is not the correct way to do it.

On the other hand, compared to some of the other listed here, his question is pretty straightforward.

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That lizard picture definitely came as a surprise to this person, because there's no way they were paying attention up to that point.

Reddit | callmemrspotatohead

Otherwise, that first reply should've at least inspired some kind of reaction. Even a "WTF" would've at least demonstrated that they bothered to read it.

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Everyone take this to heart, please and thanks.

Tumblr | straightwhiteboystexting

If we have learned anything from all the hilarity shared above, it's that these guys are not as smooth as they think they are.

Just wanting to hook up is fine, but when you're typing out that first message, please remember the rhino.

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