Joey Tribbiani's Most Important Life Quotes From 'Friends'

We love Joey Tribianni. He is a national treasure and should always be treated as such.

So today, we felt the need to celebrate that national treasure by giving you some of his best quotes from the show Friends.

When he reminded you to brag hard


Joey: Man, I remember the first time I saw that girl Katherine, after we broke up. She was just walking with her friend Donna, just laughing and talking. God, it killed me.

Chandler: Yes, but you ended up having sex with both of them that afternoon.

Joey: Sorry, I just, any excuse to tell that story y'know...

When he reminded you not to judge

Joey: Hey, Ross, I got a science question: If the Homo sapiens were, in fact, HOMO sapiens...is that why they're extinct?

Ross: Joey, Homo sapiens are PEOPLE.

Joey: Hey, I'm not judging!

When he taught us not to eat too much meat:


"Here come the meat sweats."

But darn, that turkey looked didn't it? Didn't you just want to eat the whole thing? It would definitely be something worthy of giving us the meat sweats.

The time he taught us about cows and points:


Joey: If he doesn’t like you, this is all a moo point.

Rachel: A moo point?

Joey: Yeah. It’s like a cow’s opinion. It just doesn’t matter. It’s moo.

God this guy was hilarious.

When he was on top of things:


Joey: What are we doing?

Chandler: Wasting our lives.

Joey: I meant for lunch.

Yeah Chandler, why do you have to be such a downer all the time? Joey is clearly very hungry.

When he taught us what to say when someone goes too far:


"Over the line? You’re so far past the line that you can’t even see the line! The line is a dot to you!"

The line is so far in the distance you're in a separate state!

When he taught us not to give up:


"You can’t just give up! Is that what a dinosaur would do?"

You know what Joey? Those are some real words of inspiration. Now I just need to find out what a dinosaur would do...

When he tried to pitch naked Thursdays


"We can stay up late talking, and watching movies. And you know about naked Thursdays, right?"

Nice try, Joey, but it wasn't going to work on that girl. Maybe next time.

When he reminded everyone to be open minded:


"I like it. What’s not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Good."

And that was Rachel's terrible trifle! Good for you, Joey, always supporting your friends... As long as you get to eat.

When he stepped up for his friend


"That’s right, I stepped up! She’s my friend and she needed help. If I had to, I’d pee on any one of you!"

That's the spirit, Joey! Way to be a good friend!

When he reminded us to push through when we're down:


Chandler: Uhh, you’ve had a lot of sex right?

Joey: (Nonchalantly) When? Today? Some, not a lot.

Chandler: Well, it’s just the reason that I’m asking is because I kind of eh, uh, I was unable to—I mean I really wanted too, but I couldn’t….

Joey: Don’t worry about that man, that happens.

Chandler: It’s happened to you?

Joey: Yeah! Once.

Chandler: Well, what’d you do?

Joey: I did it anyway!

When he taught us about Geography


"Nice try. See the Netherlands is this make-believe place, where Peter pan and Tinkerbell come from."

From what I heard the people of the Netherlands are pretty good at soccer too. Must be that "never growing up" thing.

When he taught us about love:


"It is a love based on giving and receiving as well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving, we too can share and love and have and receive."

And of course, his most iconic line:

"I look a woman up and down and say, "How you doin'?"

And what else can be said? The man was a treasure for all those years... He's still a treasure, in fact.